Yoga Se Hoga!

What do women want? Million dollar question. You would say... romance, flowers, expensive gifts, bling, exotic vacations. Whom are we kidding? The only thing that women want is that they should be able to happily eat anything and everything they want to, without ever putting on weight! Only if they could get rid of the tiny creatures called ‘Calories’ who sneak into our closets every night and sew our clothes tight.

Well, clearly, fantasizing about a calorie-free, guilt-free, carbs-free diet is not enough to achieve this dream. We need to move. A lot. And not just any moving. That long walk to some fitness class is the toughest move of all. After having tried my hands at almost everything from Gym to Aerobics to Zumba to Aqua Aerobics, I felt most connected with Yoga. It’s ancient roots in our culture and it’s modern depiction via the numerous online videos made it very appealing to me. Your friends have been going to that Yoga Class. It is right there in your neighbourhood club house. You are friends with the yoga instructor. She is a very sweet lady with a very sweet smile. The class timings are after you have had your nutritious breakfast and after your precious domestic help is done for the day and after your cherished children have left for their school. So, basically, there is no excuse to not join the class.

After several postponements, waiting for the coming Monday or the start of the  next month or the new year or after Diwali or before that wedding in the house and much ado, that ceremonial day arrived. I had ordered a yoga mat online. Showing it off, on my back, I began my walk of pride. I reached the class. Several mats were already spread out. Clearly, the territories were marked. 

Well, I had no intentions of sitting in the front row, right under the nose of the instructor. Once a backbencher, always a backbencher. I happily claimed the corner place, away from all the prying eyes of the  veterans. We began with a soothing prayer and Om chanting. We moved on to warm up. Ok, this was easy. I managed the stretches and survived the jumping jacks and handled the neck movements.

Then came the Suryanamaskars. I was made to stand and stretch and bend and plank and mount and pant, all in one go. 12 smaller asanas in all... and they called it one round. Somehow, I accomplished it.... only to realise that we had to do 14 ‘rounds’ in all. What was going on? The online videos of Shilpa Shetty and the like looked so simple and graceful, with her makeup intact and her clothes so perfect, from the start till the end. And here I was... barely catching my breath and wiping my sweat and pulling my t-shirt in all directions. The instructor asked us to breathe in and breathe out and neck down and back and leg here and hands there... wait... all this together??? At the same time? Phew!

We got a little treat of Shavasana after this. Great! I could literally feel my heart pump blood. Ohkay! Not bad. I had barely got my sweat dried up that we are asked to get alert for the next asanas. Leg raises. Noooooo! I am happy, thank you! First at 30 degrees, then 60 degrees and then at 90 degrees! Then in the reverse order. I never knew I had this much will power in me to not flop my legs on the floor because I wanted to prove a point. The point being that even though ‘Round is a shape’, I prefer striding confidently rather than merely rolling around. And I am gonna do it!

One asana after the next, in supine position, in prone position, in sitting position and standing position. I never even knew I had all these muscles! What all was working out, phew!! And the instructor was going on and on about ‘so and so’ internal organs being getting benefitted. Seriously? I was just hoping that she is keeping an accurate track of those few gruesome seconds that we were expected to hold the asana. I could barely soak in the information. All I cared was to detangle my hands and legs as soon as possible and catch my breath! I could feel my intestines and liver and stomach all twisted and turned. I have a newfound respect for Ramdev Baba, since.

Last, but not the least came the time for Pranayama. The hand mudras coupled with left in, right out, right in, left out, all in, none out, none in, all out.... don’t fall for the glamorous YouTube videos. It is quite an extensive meditative process. You get to know yourself better. You get to know the nature around you better. It is so rejuvenating that you feel like you can take on the entire world on your own, now. Yognidra is the occasional treat that our teacher gives us. 

It has been almost a month for me, now. God only knows how I have used every drop of motivation to attend the class, day after day. Oh, what a change, but! I feel more energetic and less lethargic. I can bend better and stretch farther. I feel like eating clean and thinking only positive thoughts. Yoga does this to you. It cleanses you, inside and outside. And also, in my opinion, Yoga is the only fitness activity that can be carried on way into our old age, alongside walking. I feel a spring in my stride, the whole day! I hope to continue this in the long run. It is an exercise not just for the body, but the mind and the soul.

Suryanamaskars... bring it on!